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Tupper’s Top Five Reasons to Love October

2 Nov
Reunion means running into old friends like Jess Kline '14. FUN!

OMD! It’s Jess Kline ’14. And she’s so happy to see me!

This article originally appeared in the October 29, 2015, issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

Good old October. The leaves begin to turn vivid reds, oranges, and yellows. Or so they say. I mean, dogs aren’t really colorblind in the way you’ve heard we are. We don’t see as many colors as humans, but we can see them. So I see browns and yellows instead of red, orange, and yellow. Learn something new every day, don’t you, humans? #TheMoreYouKnow

Besides the fact that it’s pretty, there are a few really pawsome things about October. Well, this list refers to THIS October.

I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Reasons to Love October”:

  1. LEAVES. They get really pretty. Then, the best part, they fall down. It’s so fun to sniff under each one of them, attack the rake when Ma’s trying to put them in a pile, and then run through the pile until it’s all spread out again.
  1. HALLOWEENIE. In October, all the little boys and girls dress up like their favorite superheroes and go door to door, collecting hot dogs. I don’t enjoy wearing costumes, but if I got a bag full of hot dogs, I’d consider it. As long as I didn’t have to walk around the neighborhood. Oh…..Ma says it’s just “Halloween,” and they get chocolate….which I can’t have on account of it being poisonous to dogs. I miss all the good stuff!
  1. REUNION @ HOMECOMING. WOOHOOO! A lot of my old friends come back for Alumni Weekend. And they scratch my bum and hug me and tell me how much they miss seeing me. Sigh. It’s tough when the kids grow up and leave the nest.
  1. PARENTS & FAMILY WEEKEND. Every year, the parents seem more excited to see me. Apparently, they follow me on Facebook and Twitter and they already know ALL about me. They kiss me and take my picture and tell me how handsome I am….who doesn’t love all that for 4-5 hours straight?

And my number one reason to love October is:

  1. TAILGATING. Food on the grill. Hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken, sausages…oh my! And everyone wants to feed me. Now if I could just get Ma to let me have some of that food. Quick, someone distract her!

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Reasons to Love October. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!

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My Top Five Favorite Activities on a Patriots Bye Week

8 Oct
It's 55 degrees Fahrenheit, sunny, and breezy. Let's never leave the lawn chair, Ma!

It’s 55 degrees Fahrenheit, sunny, and breezy. Let’s never leave the lawn chair, Ma!

This article originally appeared in the October 8, 2015, issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

No, we’re not going to have THAT conversation. You know which one. The one where you tell me how terrible the Pats are. I am Boston-born and raised for the first four months of my life. I think that’s the equivalent of 15 years in humans. What’s that, Ma? I was born in Raynham? That’s not Boston? I thought every town/city within 50 miles of the actual Boston was considered Boston…no? Oh, I guess there’s some sort of rule, but Ma doesn’t know because she’s from Rhode Island.

Anyway, my point is that you’re not going to get me to drink your Haterade. BOOM! I bleed red, white, and blue. Actually, my blood is only red. Please don’t cut me. BOL! But one week every football season, three to four hours miraculously opens up, and I can choose a variety of other activities. Pawsome.

I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Activities on a Patriots Bye Week”:

  1. APPLE PICKING. There are a ton of apple-picking places in Smithfield. And beyond. A lot of places offer hay rides and hot cider and – OH-MY-DOG – apple cider donuts! What’s not to love? Especially because I’m too short to actually have to do any of the work. I DO love my apple snacks.
  1. NAPS. Naps on naps on naps. This is EXCELLENT weather for napping, don’t you think? Gotta re-charge the batteries. Check the inside of your eyelids for anomalies. If I’m being honest, though, I nap a lot in all types of weather. BOL.
  1. SOCIAL MEDIA UPDATE. I got A LOT of followers. And I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Vine, and Instagram. I don’t always get to see what my friends are up to, and it’s nice to catch up. And my followers demand regular updates from me. It’s the least I can do – share my extreme handsomeness with the world.
  1. DVR DELETING. Catching up on the fall television shows is imperative. What happened to Deacon? What is going on with Castle and Beckett? Why is Gibbs crankier than ever? Inquiring dogs want to know!

And my number one favorite activity on a Patriots bye week is:

  1. QUALITY LAWN CHAIR TIME. What an excellent way to spend an hour or so on a beautiful fall day. And Ma usually takes advantage of the face that we’re outside to give me a good brushing….ahhh…the Kong brush is awesome. The fur is flying. Don’t stop, Ma!

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Activities on a Patriots Bye Week. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!

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My Top Five Favorite Summer 2015 Events

26 Sep
Ma! MA! Can you turn the AC up, please? It’s “gettin’ hot in hrrrre”…BOL!

Ma! MA! Can you turn the AC up, please? It’s “gettin’ hot in hrrrre”…BOL!

This post originally appeared as a Tupper’s Tidbits column in the September 23, 2015, issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

I’m not going to lie – summer is, like, the WORST time of year for me. I know, I know: You humans LOVE summer. Hot weather, beer, pools, vacations – all the staples of well-enjoyed human summer.

But put yourselves in my paws for a few minutes. Hot weather can kill me in 5-10 minutes because of my smushed-in face. We dogs cool off by panting, but if we have no snouts, we have less ability to cool off. We sweat through the pads of our feet…which are on pavement…which boasts temperatures upwards of 125°F in the summer. Beer? Ma won’t share. Something about it being toxic for dogs. That’s what she SAYS, anyway.

THIS is how I feel about pools.

THIS is how I feel about pools.

Pools? Fuhgeddaboudit! Bulldogs sink like stones. We can’t swim. Too much – ahem – MUSCLE densely packed. Most of us. Some bulldogs can. I don’t like water at all though. Won’t even go in the kiddie pool Ma got for me. Vacation? Try again. Ma says she can afford bulldogs or she can afford vacations, but she can’t afford both. So we stay home. That’s even worse for me!

Anyway, even though summer isn’t my favorite season, I enjoyed a few things this year. I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Summer 2015 Events”:

  1. DAD HAD SURGERY. Now I know what you’re thinking: Tup, that’s terrible! But hear me out…he needed those new knees…and I got to spend a few weeks with the Momma because she was lonely. AND THEN SHE TOOK ME TO WORK EVERY DAY! So much fun.
  1. BOXES. A lot of stuff gets delivered to Academic Records in the summer and that means I get to shred the boxes they came in…I HAVE CONQUERED CARDBOARD!
  1. CAMPUS CONSTRUCTION. Yeah, sure, we had to take a lot of detours to get to the office, but more construction equals more construction workers equals more people to pet me because I’m so awesome.
  1. HOME MAINTENANCE. Ma had a few things done around the house. Of course, they all fell in love with me. And asked for me so they could pet me. Ma’s favorite was when the pellet stove cleaner came and ran his industrial vacuum for two straight hours…and I angrily barked at it for the full two hours. Fun!

And my number one favorite event this summer was:

  1. PHYSICIAN ASSISTANT PROGRAM STUDENTS. Folks, this master’s degree program is challenging. They needed me all summer for pet therapy. Which I gladly provided. I’ve never felt so loved over the summer! So glad Bryant started this PA program!

 

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Summer 2015 Events. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!

Three Stages of Leaving Campus

24 Jun

It should come as no surprise to any of you – I LOVE BEING BRYANT’S MASCOT!

What’s not to love? Adoration. Scratches. Treats. Scratches. Bacon. Scratches. Hot dogs…

When you’re “Big Dog On Campus,” it’s really challenging to go home, where your family may not keep you up on that pedestal that your students, faculty, and staff have had you on all day. In fact, I’m treated like ALL THE OTHER DOGS in the house! Can you believe that? Me? Mascot royalty!

Understandably, I’m often reluctant to leave campus. Okay, not just “often.” I’m ALWAYS reluctant to leave campus. Here are my three stages at the end of the work day:

1) No. No, I will not go there, no, I will not obey.

This is a total shock to me. How could you ask me to leave?

This is a total shock to me. How could you ask me to leave?

2) HA HA! I’m under the desk…you can’t make me move.

You're an old human and incapable of moving my strong bulldog body.

You’re an old human and incapable of moving my strong bulldog body.

3) Oh, SHOOT! I forget how strong you are, Momma T. And smart, to put me in this rolling chair and save yourself the aggravation of getting me to move three steps at a time.

They see me rollin', they hatin'.... Nice to see you finally recognize my royal stature.

They see me rollin’, they hatin’…. Nice to see you finally recognize my royal stature. Walking is for plebes.

It takes a village: Raising a University mascot

21 Apr

You may have seen my recent post that I received the 2015 Bryant University Spirit Award. Or, rather, my moms did.

“The Spirit Award is presented to a team that enhances the quality of life at Bryant by preserving, promoting, and carrying out positive and quantifiable values and traits. They go above and beyond what’s expected in serving Bryant University.”

They got the award for taking care of me because I am an integral part of the Bryant community now! And they do it as volunteers – they don’t get paid to do so…they just love me because I’m family. I remember May 2010 like it was yesterday…I was a little, 20-lb nugget being introduced during Commencement and carried across the stage to receive my degree in “Character and Obedience,” honoris causa (that means “honorary degree!”)

It took a couple of years before people knew about me. But thank Dog for social media!

I couldn’t have received this Spirit Award without my Uncle Ron and Auntie Kati Machtley, who had the vision to understand that a college needs a proper, live mascot. They searched until they found my moms – Claire and Tina Senecal, mother and daughter and long-time Bryant employees – who agreed to give me a home (or two).

Thank you to those who work in Academic Records for helping to watch me, entertain me, scratch me, and fetch me when students come in the office to get pet therapy before class or after tough exams. And thanks to those in University Relations who scratch my bum when I come in for a visit.

Auntie Kristin helping the tailor with my fitting

Auntie Kristin helping the tailor with my fitting

Special thanks go out to my Auntie Kristin and Uncle “DP” Penta. When she first started working here, Auntie Kristin fell in love with my squishy face. Over the years, the Pentas have supported me in many ways. They donated my stroller to me, they watch me when Ma has to do something “real quick,” they asked their tailor to make my official jersey, and Uncle DP built a “throne” for me to use in the basketball stands so I don’t have to sit on Ma’s lap. She’s not super comfortable. I know Ma appreciates all they’ve done, too!

And, of course, thank you to the students, alumni, parents, staff, and faculty who find me “irresistabull.” The ones who invite me to their events and appreciate my representing this fabulous university. I’m thankful that you appreciate me and that you understand when I can’t attend absolutely everything I’m invited to (even though I’d love to be able to go to everything). Gratitude to all my friends on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Vine who have no connection to Bryant but who continue to support me and share my posts. It means the world to me!

With so many wonderful people here, I’m honored to call Bryant University my home. Woof!

Hanging out on my throne in the stands at the half, waiting for some scratchies.

Hanging out on my throne in the stands at the half, waiting for some scratchies.

Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Things About Basketball v. 2015

16 Mar
Hanging out on my throne in the stands at the half, waiting for some scratchies.

Hanging out on my throne in the stands at the half, waiting for some scratchies.

This article originally appeared in the March 5 issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

To say that I love basketball is an understatement. Well, if I’m being completely honest, I love all sports in which a ball is being thrown around and might come tantalizingly close to my jaws.

You may have noticed that I often walk around with some sort of ball in my mouth. If you mentioned that fact to my mom, she might have told you that I refuse to move WITHOUT my ball. Hey, everybody’s got their “thing,” right? Someone who’s insecure about their intellect might always talk about grades…someone who’s insecure about looks might post, like, a THOUSAND selfies a day.

Me? I KNOW I’m smart and beautiful. And charming. And humble…BOL! Some people speculate that I like to suckle on a ball because I was taken from my bulldog ma too soon, but that’s definitely not the case – I lived with my bulldog mom till I was 16 weeks old. That’s twice as long as most puppies! Most of my bulldog friends (I got tons on Twitter, IG, and FB!) like to suckle on blankets or stuffed animals, too.

Anyway, Bryant Basketball isn’t ALL about the ball. I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Things About Bryant Basketball”:

  1. BASKETBALL. I know I said it isn’t ALL about the ball. But it’s a little bit about it! I love to watch the players run up and down the court bouncing it. It’s mesmerizing. Still waiting for someone to bounce it my way.
  1. DRIBBLING. Glad to know I’m not the only one who does this. Dribbling, I mean. Oh…Ma says it’s a different kind of dribbling. Wait…so I’m still the only one drooling at the games? Ma says other people might be drooling figuratively for different reasons, but I’m the only one who does so literally. That’s cool. I’ve always been a rebel.
  1. POPCORN. Sometimes, I’ll drop the ball when someone lets their kid carry his or her own popcorn ‘cuz that stuff goes EVERYWHERE when little kids try to walk and hold onto it at the same time!
  1. MY THRONE. Do you see my throne in the picture? My Uncle DP made that for me. And he brings it to every game I go to so that I have someplace to sit because the benches are too narrow. Hey, my legs are too short to anchor me. It’s a ruff life being the mascot sometimes…BOL! My Uncle DP and Auntie Kristin are awesome. They are not only MY fans – they’re fans of all Bryant athletics and huge supporters.

And my number one favorite thing about Bryant Basketball is:

  1. PEOPLE. Tons of people and most want one thing: To scratch my bum. I approve.

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Favorite Things About Bryant Basketball. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!

Tupper’s Top Five Winter Activities – 2015

26 Feb
Tupper snow angels...it's how I roll...get it? BOL!

Tupper snow angels…it’s how I roll…get it? BOL!

This article originally appeared in the February 26 issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

Here’s the thing…I love winter…usually: I can stay outside and play, and mom doesn’t worry about my allergies or heatstroke or anything. But this winter has been kind of brutal. I like the snow, but I don’t like when it’s actually snowing. What can I say? I’m a complicated dog with complex feelings and emotions…BOL! This winter, it seems like it’s ALWAYS snowing. But take heart, humans. When this article gets published, it will be 22 days until spring. Twenty-two days! In the meantime, here are some suggestions to pass the time in the winter. I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Winter Activities.”

  1. SNOW ANGELS! Make sure you wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, too. If you want the full Tuppy experience, you gotta be naked. It’s so soothing…trust me. Full disclaimer: Ma says DON’T trust me and rolling around in the snow naked is not recommended.
  1. ARTISTIC EXPRESSION! That’s what I call it when I lift my leg on every single inch of the walls of snow that line our bathroom paths. I mean, I’m limited by my height and the media (white “canvas,” yellow “paint”), but it’s still pretty fun! I’ve left my mark on every bit of the pathway Ma shoveled for me and the Frenchies.
  1. REJUVENATING FACIAL TREATMENTS! Just throw your face right in the nearest snowbank and motorboat that snow…ahhh…feels SO good! And it’s FREE. You won’t usually pay less than $50 for a good spa treatment like that.
  1. SHOVELING! I am a BIG help. Basically, this winter, with snow every other day, I’m completely INVALUABLE. If you want to see me in action, check out my six-second Vine video. HUGE help.

And my number one favorite winter activity is:

  1. EATING BACON! What’s the best thing to do when it’s cold and snowy out? Eat something warm, delicious, and satisfying, of course. Gives you sustenance for all of the aforementioned activities, too. What’s that, Ma? She says that eating bacon is technically not a winter activity. Technicality, I say. It’s an activity, and you can do it in the winter!

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Winter Activities. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!

BaconQuest

24 Dec

If you follow me on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or Vine, you already know I am ALWAYS on the hunt for bacon. I call it my personal BaconQuest.

Sometimes, such as the day before a major holiday, the bacon seeks ME out!

Here’s how it breaks down:

1) Ma wakes me up from my restful slumber

Oh, hey...here to rub my belly, Ma?

Oh, hey…here to rub my belly, Ma?

2) I sense a pork-product disturbance in the atmosphere

Pork-product Disturbance

Holy mother of Porky! What do I smell?

3) My sniffer’s working overtime

Just a tiny edge of this treat is visible!

Just a tiny edge of this treat is visible!

4) I’m actually moving…into “treat-receiving” position

Licking chops

OMNOMNOM! GIMME, GIMME, GIMME!

5) Being told I have to wait…WAIT?? Do you know who I am??

What? Stay still? IMPOSSIBLE!

What? Stay still? IMPOSSIBLE!

6) Making a grab for it

Faster than a speeding bullet when bacon is involved!

Faster than a speeding bullet when bacon is involved!

7) SUCCESS! BaconQuest fulfilled for today. I shall start my quest shortly for tomorrow…

YES! The most flavorful treat around!

YES! The most flavorful treat around!

Hey, Ma! You got a package from Amazon!

17 Nov

Listen, Ma, I know you’re super-busy at work doing your associate registrar thing, so let me help you open this package.

One second...

One second…

Let me just…I got it…I’m just going to hold it down with my right paw here, and…

Uh, ex-CYOOOZ me...

Uh, ex-CYOOOZ me…

You can just back up there, pupperazzi. I said I don’t need your help!

Hey, Ma (Woof!)

Hey, Ma (Woof!)

Ma, can you get this human with the camera outta my face? You know how I feel about cameras. And, geez…this carpet in Academic Records Office is totally disgusting!

Fine...

Fine…

I’ll turn around then…it’s none of your beeswax what’s in the box, anyway!

Tupper’s Tidbits: Top 5 Bryant Football Facts

14 Nov

 

TuppersTidbits-Fall2014_5

C’mon, Alberti, right through the uprights! AND THE KICK IS GOOD!

 

This article originally appeared in the November 13, 2014, issue of The Archway, Bryant’s student newspaper.

And just in time for a HUGE game between the 8-1 Bryant Bulldogs and the 8-2 defending NEC conference champs, the Sacred Heart Pioneers, I’m divulging facts about Bryant’s football team.

Bryant’s been around a long time – 151 years, to be exact. I’ve only been around four and a half of those years, but I know a lot about Bryant. I’m a bit of a history buff…BOL, just kidding. My mom writes a lot about Bryant, so she tells me all this stuff. Sometimes I listen. Okay, it’s rare, but I guess I absorb it through osmosis or something.

So I might know a few things about Bryant that you don’t. Knowledge is power, folks. So I’m going to tell you a bit about Bryant’s football team. I present to you “Tupper’s Top Five Bryant Football Facts – By The Numbers.”

  1. 1999! That’s the first year Bryant had a football team. No, seriously. That means that even freshmen are older than Bryant’s football team! Mom graduated from Bryant before we had a team. She’s very elderly, but she’s feisty, so don’t try to steal me while we’re at the games. She works out by carrying me up and down the stairs.
  1. TWO! That is the number of head football coaches the Bryant Bulldogs have had. Isn’t that crazy, when you think about it? Alabama has had 27. Of course, their team started playing in 1892. I think that’s the year my mom was born. BOL. Ba-dum-bump!
  1. EIGHT! That’s how many wins Bryant Bulldogs have had this season. It’s also the number of wins the Bulldogs had in 2006 and 2007. Before we became a Division I athletic school. Those eight wins in each of those years snared us the conference champion title. Alright, we were TIED for champion, but it’s still pretty pawsome. Mom says champions get to dump Gatorade over their coach’s head…who doesn’t want to see Coach Fine in Gatorade? Go, Bulldogs!
  1. THREE! That’s the number of hot dogs mom will share with me at the football games. I think this is totally unfair. I mean, there’s like TRUCKLOADS of hot dogs at the game. She says a lot of stuff in response to my asking for more. Sounds a lot like Charlie Brown’s teacher. Too rich, too processed, pancreatitis, bark, bark, bark.

And the number one Bryant football fact by the numbers is:

  1. ZERO! That is the number of home football games I’ve missed since I became mascot in May 2010. We don’t always stay for the whole game – that depends on the weather and whether or mom feels like I’m in distress. But I’ve been at every home football game. The next one is Saturday, November 22. It’s also the last one of the season. Senior Day. Plan now; kick-off is at noon – I want to see everyone there.

So there you have it. Tupper’s Top Five Bryant Football Facts – By The Numbers. Don’t forget – I’m on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Vine. Get at me! I’ll see you soon. ’Til next time…WOOF!